By Jack Handey:
I wish a robot would get elected president. That way, when he came to town, we could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad.
You know, alot of my readers say "Joe, why no politics on Cataclasis? all you do is post shit about rocks and music...surely you've got an opinion in this aggressive political climate!"
Well, I kinda really hate the day-to-day political discussions. Pundits kinda make me nauseous. Politicians pander way to much, and the majority of the media just seems like a bunch of petty bickering.
Here's a good example that really pissed me off:
Obama Apologizes because he's got no balls If your a politician and you think American Lives are being wasted in iraq, then fucking stand up and say it. Personally I think they are too.
What are they dying for and what are they over there for? I don't think anyone right now thinks thats an easy question to answer.
The comment was clearly intended to criticize our current administration. Media needs to convey the context, not just the meaning of the words in a sentence
I do think lives are being wasted, and thats not meant to disrespect the troops over there. Its a fucking middle finger to the liars who put those troops in place.
What Obama should have done is say just that "fuck you media, this is what I said...." but he didn't, he pandered and sold out and apologized.
and this too:
Edwards fires his bloggers because he's a big pussy.
Edwards actually looks like a great candidate, but firing your bloggers for offended the OPPOSITION! your a spineless FUCK.
you know what religious people need to hear?: "Get out of our government and take your bullshit dogmatic religious beliefs and FUCK OFF!"
If Edwards is gonna pander to these people then he'll pander to them as a president, waffle on the tough issues. Your a politician, have an opinion. if you think you have to change or silence your position on tough issues, you have no right to be a government leader.
I really want a political leader who is just that, A LEADER. Someone who stands up and cuts through all the media hype and bullshit.
Here's the candidate that I want to see:
1. S(he) is an antheist. who says, "religious people can suck my fucking ass". Our Current president said once that he received his advice from God. look at where we're at today...fuck religious people. they are the WORST fucking LEADERS we could possibly have in Government.
2. Get us out of the middle east. Certainly not an easy problem. I'd like to see some plans. your a candidate for president, lets get down to brass tacks, throw some maps across the meeting room table and formulate a plan to STOP WASTING LIVES IN IRAQ!
3. Socialized health care. My Friend Jay tells me all the time about his insurance problems, certainly we hear about it all the time in the news. its time to do something, make some good social change.
4. Free education for all. EVERYONE should have a free education all the way through a pH. D. if you maintain your grades, and do well, the US govt. will back you. I'd support a tax increase for this. there's so much data out there that shows there's a direct relationship between education level and standard of living. Schools can remain prestigious and competitive too. But ensure that everyone can get a college degree if they want it.
While we're at it, improve the schools. Make teaching a competitive position. massive pay increases for all teachers, make it so only the best of the best can get in.
5. Convict the Bush administration for war crimes, crimes against america, and for lying. Seriously. I think Bush should have a legacy, and that legacy is "if you fuck with america, you will be hanged for treason". Suspension of Habeas Corpus, Illegal wiretapping, WASTING LIVES in a lie of a war are all worthy of conviction, Bush, Rumsfeld, his entire cabinet, etc.. all of them should be in Prison for a LONG time. I really want to see this come to fruition. PRISON for what they've done to America.
6. Amending drug laws. the war on drugs is ridiculous, lets stop lying to our kids about it and start acting like we know what we're doing.
7. Someone who stands up for what they truely believe in! you will never be able to satisfy All americans. all you can do is be the person you are, stand up for what you believe in, and take a stand.
"I'm pro-choice I'll vote pro-choice across the board when I become president"
"Where do I stand on gun control? I'd allow hunting guns, and ban every-fucking-other-thing"
"I'm for allowing Biological scientists and the scientific community for the policing and policy making concerning stem-cell research, I'd never vote for legislation banning anything related to it"
"I'm a humnan being, during the course of my candidacy I might say things that sound stupid, it might come out slightly wrong, and the media might try to rip me apart over it, but let me be clear, before my candidacy is over, you will know what and how I will enforce my term in office"
These are the statments I'm waiting to hear. Since you'll never hear it from a politician, I will refrain from the daily retarded discourse over the "controversy of Obama's Middle name!" or "Obama dresses like a terrorist!" or "Fox News has a new Comedy show!"