Wednesday, January 31, 2007


If I ever start making really busted and tired sexist jokes to my fellow male co-workers, I want someone to stab me in the neck with a pencil.

I've got a few co-workers who do this. They either make some busted joke OR they repeat a mildly amusing statement until you want to follow your office chair out the 7th floor window.

I'm always dumbstruck when people say this shit to me. How am I supposed to respond? Laugh? I don't think so. I'm not gonna dignify your faggotry with a snicker or a courtesy laugh.

Here's an example:

I'm sitting in the office, trying to get over my lunch coma, sipping some tea. My older male coworker comes over and asks if I can make a map for him. I say "yeah sure man..sounds good".

Rather than leave it at that, he proceeds to tell me that our client, who is the ultimate recipient of this map, has really big feet, and big hands...and you know...chicks dig guys with big feeT!!! because that means they have big dicks too! yah get it?! whacka whacka whacka!!!

Ugh. old man dicks are not, and never were, funny. its goddamned repulsive.

....Now wait a minute, just wait....don't get me wrong. I enjoy a good joke (dirty or otherwise), it can be funny in the right time and place. Some of the best office jokesters say some of the most ridiculous bullshit.

But there's a few things that you need to bust out a great one-liner or joke:

1. a receptive audience
2. Wit/charisma/cleverness
3. a situation that calls for it.

Most people can get away with a good joke when #'s 1 and 3 line up. you don't need much of number 2 if you wait for the right situation. The key is recognizing when the above elements are coming together...stray even a razor-line away and you look like a massive douchebag.

If you can't master any of these, don't try.

Next time you want me to make a map for your project, don't tell me the client has a big dick. When our female co-workers walk away, don't make some remark about their butts or boobs, just because they happened to walk away and I'm the only guy standing around. Believe me, there's plenty of funny things to say about our female coworkers without resorting to something you expect from a drunk uncle.

I'm doing it!

I'm gonna run this .

Who's with me?

I started training yesterday, bad knees and hectic summer schedule be damned.

Anyone want in? Serious training starts 19 weeks prior to the race.

I'll be forming my race group then. slow people and shitwits need not apply.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Awesomest Picture I've ever taken...

Here it is:

I went to hawaii in 2003, and hiked out on to the fresh lava flows to where the active lava was flowing.

It was such a crazy site. the lava was cascading down the hillside, clinker Aa lava was crashing down all over, and oozing out from the base of the slope was this small flow of pahoehoe lava. It was hissing slightly, quietly. I could have watched it for hours. in fact I think I stood there for well over an hour watching it. For scale, the picture represents about 5-6 feet, so the flow itself is about 3-4 feet across or so.


thats about all I have today....

Explosions in the SKY!

My friend Jay photoshop'ed my snowmobile jump picture:

to be honest, I'm pretty sure that this new picture is alot closer to how it happened in real life. Now if someone could just put in some hot chicks that look really really impressed then I think it'd be really close to how it was in reality.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Fuck You, Salad World!

I work in a skyscraper in downtown Denver, in Granite Tower, 7th Floor, to be exact. Funny, because it is not made of granite, and it really isn't that much of a tower. Its a pretty standard office building, I work in a cube when I'm here. I ride the elevator. I can relate well to office-related comedy movies and tv shows.

Usually I"m pretty good about bringing a lunch to work with me. I also have a decent assortment of snacks at my desk...bag of pistachios, some pretzels, etc...

Every now and then my wife and I get a wild-hair up our collective ass and think "man, we should eat healthier". So on the days when I am either too lazy or too hurried to bring my lunch in to work, I usually go down to this place called "Salad World".

Salad World is conveniently situated right next to our building, and as you might guess, they serve salads. Its owned (I think) by a nice Asian couple. Its just a small place, you walk in, there's 2 rows of salad-bar and some styrofoam containers. You walk through the salad bar, put whatever salad you want into your little container, and then they weigh it at the cash register (I think its $5.99 per lb). The whole operation appears to be pretty easy-going, clean, and fresh. The Floors are usually recently-mopped, and the whole place is very well lit. The idea of getting a salad for lunch makes you think "yes, I'm not gonna be a fat-slob, I'm eating salad, I care about myself!"

Here's the catch. Nestled in between the row of lettuce, the cucumbers, the fresh cabbage and peas, there's a small steam table. In the steam table is probably one of the most disgusting things you'll ever see: slices of shit-cheap sausages and pre-made SYSCO-style meatballs, all covered in the most disgusting cheap-ass barbeque sauce. One Ladle-full of this shit is probably 4,000 calories; all of it saturated fat and cholesterol. It is of little-to-no nutritional value.

Its like a massive middle-finger in the middle of your well-intentioned healthy lunch plans. It stares back at you, its angry with you, it fucking hates your guts. Its saying "c'mon you rapidly-aging corporate fat piece of shit, you know you want me."

...And I always get some of it. No matter how strong my will-power or discipline.

I sneak back to my little cube, container of "salad" reeking like BO, meat, and shitty BBQ and eat. Oh sure, I still get the salad part...I usually stock up on the broccoli, carrots, and cauliflower..but there's always that fucking sausage mix.

And every time after eating it I think "thats the last time, that fucking plate of sausages won't get me next time. its cold, its gross, I hate it..I'm never getting that again!"

So a week or two goes by, and then I end up back at salad world.

Crested Butte, Part 3!

This is exactly why I love my job sometimes.

We went to Crested Butte again, and went up to a mine site to install data-loggers...basically these boxes that record water level and electrical conductivity of stream water.

We installed them to monitor the amount of runoff coming from this mine site, since it has a lot of potential for acid mine drainage. The data loggers will take measurements every 15 minutes 24 hours a day to monitor the surface water activity at the mine site.

Since the area was snowed in, we had to use snowmobiles:

This is us getting ready to head up to the site. I'm on the right wearing the black coveralls, to my left is Chris (my coworker), and Christina - the EPA project manager.

This is a view Down-valley from the site. the big wooden box in the foreground is an orebox from the old mine. check out that clean unbroken snow! before us, no one had been up to the site in the winter. it was beautiful.

Here's me trying to take a water sample from the stream...and yes, the snow was waist deep. I tied a sampling bottle to the end of the pole in my right hand, and dug out the stream from under the snow with the shovel in my left. The site itself is at about 11,000 feet, and even though this has been a low-snow year for the crested butte area, it was still drifted very deep in places. Some drifts were as deep as 10-15 ft.

Here's a picture of the site from the trail when we were leaving. So pretty, so quiet, so peaceful. It was fun tear-assing around the site on a 2-stroke snowmobile.

This is what the data-logger system looks like. Its basically an electric panel on a post. On top of the electrical box is a solar panel for power (the solar panel is made by British Petroleum (BP) of all people), and a satellite uplink antenna. These systems are fucking ridiculously expensive...mainly because of the satellite uplink.

There's cord that runs from a flume (a little trough that sits in the river) to the electrical box. The electrical panel records the water level and the conductivity, then after a period of time, sends the data via satellite to a server. From there, we can sit-ass in the office here and download the data. kinda cool.

As I mentioned, we did quite a bit of snow-mobiling to get around on the site. Here's me getting ready to take off on one of these bad-boys.

Here's what one of the sleds looks like with 500 lbs of equipment on it.

Here's my co-worker Chris doing a burn-out on one of the sleds. Chris was an excellent rider, and showed me how to do a ton of really risky and unnecessarily dangerous shit on the snowmobiles.

Prior to this trip, I've never really been on one of these things.

woo-hoo! Here's me jumping the snowmobile. Luckily neither myself, or the sled was damaged. That was at the end of the day, after we installed all the equipment and had a few minutes to run around and enjoy the snowmobiles.

good times!

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Cataclasis is on Haitus for a few days

I've got to go on another field job until friday. so I won't be behind my computer very much, certainly not enough to think of something good to write about.

Hopefully I'll come back with some sweet pictures of this adventure. Yep, we're going back to crested butte, which means more snow-mobile related field work. Snowy weather, high mountain passes, snowmobiles and, this job can be good sometimes.

I also have to use my time to try and come up with a way to make yuppie-ism the new punk-rock, in order to hold up a half-drunken boast I made a few days ago.

until then....


Sunday, January 21, 2007

An open letter...

...To our suspectedly gay retired neighboor-

While in the course of this el nino driven winter we have both enjoyed and despised the snow that now lies on all of our lawns, we certainly do appreciate your attempts to keep our neighborhood clean and clear of most weather related hazards. This includes, but is not limited to, the widening of our sidewalk, the removal of road debris from around our parked cars, the removal of snow-plowed banks of heavy snow, and the maintenance of our street corners. The dual-track, 4-stroke, cub-cadet snow-thrower you wield is a metaphor for the strength and tenacity that each and every American should aspire to.

I am truly sorry I don't remember your name. Do you recall that fateful late-spring day when you mumbled your name over the street noise (...was it adam? henry? robert?), we were just moving in, two more young sheep amongst your flock that includes all people on West 29th Avenue, from Julien to King streets?

I thought at first you reminded me of Willie Tanner (the dad from Alf). Later I came to respect your neighborhood omnipotence, thinking you closer to Patrick Stewart in Dune.

Of course, I'm writing to you today to let you know that your Patrick Sewart care has been turned into a creepy Col. Frank Fitts, USMC.. While I do appreciate your vigilance; your constant presence in your front window, scanning the world doesn't strike me as Rear Window curiosity, but rather more as the ex-marine Dad in American Beauty.

You must admit, the similarities are there...sweat-stained V-neck t-shirts worn as late as November, the insistance on smoking cigarettes on my front porch while telling me that you can file down my week-old garden shovel until it has a head-removing sharpness and balance, telling me on repeated occasions how you want to show me your classic car collection in your back garage, and your passive-aggressive comments about certain people on our street.

In the morning when I leave for the bus stop, you are always there, back-light by your dinner room light, staring out your front window, watching me while you eat what appears to be a thick piece of meatloaf and gravy. Whats up with that?

Please, for the sake of our street, remember that inasmuch as we appreciate your patriarchal care of all 19 people living on the 3300 block of West 29th avenue, we also appreciate our privacy. Not just our own, but yours too.


your neighbors

Saturday, January 20, 2007

600 hundred years of degenerate, godless, inhuman behavior!

I saw this posted this morning. The band is "Suffocation" and now I can't wait to watch this on the history channel.

Time to sharpen up my sword, and don the spiked cod-piece of death.

Friday, January 19, 2007

I can't think of much today

its thoughts are consumed by what I'm doing this weekend. Which is nothing.

so rather than post a bunch of shit, I'll leave you with this picture:

In the past I've been pretty quiet about my affinity for geology. But its true, I really like geology.

One of the single most AWESOME aspects of geology is just how cool it looks. Think of any outdoor panorama, from the Grand Tetons to the Grand Canyon...its all rocks and geology. The above picture is no different, you don't have to be a super geologist to think "shit man, that looks pretty cool" and if you don't think its pretty cool then your probably a fascist.

The above picture is from a beach I was at up in Washington state. I'll spare you the long, dry gory details about what these rocks are, but suffice it to say that they are flippin' sweet. The lower tilted green rocks were scraped up onto the north american continent by a process known as subduction (its part of an ophiolite if you want to be really technical about it). the green rocks formed at the bottom of the ocean, waaay deep. and the sandy rocks on top of it are way younger, and formed by an old river draining into the ocean. Together, the rocks form a rock structure called an angular unconformity.

That doesn't really sound like much, but If there's a geological equivalent of the apple hitting Newton on the head, its the angular unconformity. A geologist named James Hutton was looking at an angular unconformity trying to figure out how all the rocks of the earth could have formed the way they did. According to people back in his time, the wasn't that old...older than a few thousand years - younger than a few million years. It was unimagined that the earth could be as old as the 4.5 billion years we think of today. So in traveling around the countryside, James hutton saw the angular unconformity at Siccar Point in Scotland and determined that the earth had to be wicked old (brutally old)...there was no other way to explain all of the different rocks and structures without a very old earth.

Something as simple and elegant as this outcrop of rocks carries significant meaning to earth's history. Think of it this way, there's about 60 million years of earth's history in that picture...from the formation of the ocean, to abduction of its sediments on to the continent, to the formation of a river, to the development of soil and beaches and trees and geologists taking pictures.

suck on that, creationist.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Everyone, Break your knees!

Scott Vogel is the singer for the band Terror. He's also been the singer in Buried Alive, Despair, and Slugfest. In addition to the multitude of bands he's screamed for, he's also known for shouting out the most absurd crowd-riling statements. They usually work. Terror shows are some of the most fun times you can have in denver, in my opinion.

The band is pretty stereotypical in terms of hardcore, but its GOOD hardcore. lots of hooks and breaks, thrashy parts and mid-tempo breakdowns that usually throw the crowd from a wicked circle-pit into a ridiculously violent two-step kung-fu street fight.

Terror is playing here in denver in a few weeks, and I'll probably go see them again.

The last time I saw Terror, I actually broke my knee stage-diving. It was the dumbest thing I've ever done, and quite possibly one of the most painful.

Terror was playing a small venue here in Denver called Rock Island. At rock island, the stage is only about waist height off the ground, so in order to stage dive effectively, you have to be able to jump up over the top of people and onto the crowd.

Now those of you who freqent mosh-worthy concerts know that in a typical most pit, the crowd splits. In the very front of the venue, smashed against the stage are the superfans. They know all the fucking song lyrics and shout them back at the singer as hard as they can. This also tends to be the refuge of girls, and smaller people who don't want to get smashed by the frenzied pit behind them.

Picture from Agnostic Front's Last CBGB's show. Note all the people on stage, and smashed up against the stage, and that there's one guy who just staged dived...

The Pit behind them is usually pretty spacious as this is where the knuckle-dragging 30 year old failures puff their chest up and slam around as hard as they can, injuries are common here, bad tattoos (dragons, superheros, and naked chicks) are even more common. Typically, fights break out here at least 4 times a show, if its a good show. Its the place I start out in, and then as I get more tired, I squeeze up front, or fade to the back bar area to get another beer.

This is a pit area from Hellfest, note the skinny-ass vegan kids, the 30 something yuppies having identity problems, the star wars nerds, crusties, and thugs.

There are 2 basic ways that you can get on stage for a stage-dive. you can run up behind the front-row squeeze people, grab their shoulders and pull yourself up and over them, kicking their heads as you land face first onto the stage, or you can try and go around, to the sides of the stage and risk getting stuck behind the stage monitors or floor speakers (some people prefer the latter, climb the floor speakers and dive directly into the crowd, avoiding the stage altogether - these people are fucking crazy).

So At this Terror show, I went up through the front line and onto the stage. I waited for the breakdown in the song called "spit my rage" because its pretty tuff, and these days I usually have only 1 or 2 good dives per show. I then Dove head-first off the left side of the stage. It was actually pretty successful, I landed on a group of fairly accepting people, who proceeded to push me head-over-heels backwards into the pit area. I was on my back in the crowd and my head was falling down, and some guy (or maybe a hot chick?) pushed my butt up so that my legs came over my head and down first, like a backwards summersalt.

I actually landed on my feet....and that was my downfall. because instead of landing with bent knees, I stiff-legged the landing. My left knee took the brunt of the damage (actual diagnosis: torn meniscus, impact fracture to the Tibia). I fell to the ground (not a good place to be in a mosh pit), and some kid helped me up saying "are you ok man?". I said, pathetically, sweatily, and 1/2 drunkedly "no...". He pulled me all the way back to the bar - in the rear of the club - and sat me on a stool and left. My fucking knee was searing in pain. I broke my left ankle once, but it didn't hear nearly as bad as this. it was like someone poured molten tellerium on the back of my knee.

I left the club, or rather, I hobbled and commenced one of the most stupidly brutal urban hikes of my entire existence.

Like a dumbass, I left my cell phone at work, and had no way to call anyone I knew. I also was too embarassed to ask anyone nearby... and also I thought, "what person would like a sweaty wierd limping guy use their phone?"

So I walked. I walked about 10 feet, then rested against the wall of a building or sat on a newspaper box for a few minutes, then walk again. I walked all the way back to my office. it took me a little more than an hour. by the time I reached the office, my knee had started to tighten up, and while sitting there waiting for my wife to come and get me, I wondered how I would be able to get back up and in to the car. Needless to say, getting back down into her car was almost twice as painful.

So what the fuck? what's the moral of this story? Well, if you live a spiteful, hardcore lifestyle that includes suggesting a creationist may somehow be directly responsible for the death of their parents, then maybe sometimes you're gonna snap a few knees.

Also, pictures are from, they sell good records on ebay.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

its Creation science fair time!

Its almost time again for this year's Creation "science" fair for homeschooled children. If I still lived in the midwest I'd really have a hard time not going to this. Its at the Har Mar Mall.

I've got 2 problems with this:

1. They are Creationsits. Rather than teach their children good science and letting them explore interesting topics, the beat this bullshit into their brains, so not only will they be alarmingly ignorant, they also won't be able to compete with other kids if and when they ever get to college. they certainly would have a real eye-opener in geology, biology, and chemistry classes.

2. They are Homeschooled. I've never met a home-schooled kid that wasn't bat-shit fucking crazy. they have NO social skills, are amazingly self-centered (even more than me), and have no fucking concept of group-work.

In high school some friends and I used to go skateboarding at Heath Benroud's half-pipe. Heath was a kid in our high school (and I think he was homeschooled for part of his education), I never actually met or talked to him, but some friends did.

Apparently Heath's dad died in some tragic work accident and his mom and brother were rich because of it. I have no way to back that up, but thats what I heard in high school. They lived out west of the old Hudson dogtrack, a horrid place that I actually worked at, and had a back field where they built a really nice half pipe.

the half pipe was about 6 feet from the base of the transition to the coping, no real vert and was very forgiving because of that. you could ride it all day long, it was awesome. My friend erik refused to spend money on knee pads, and so eachof use only had 1 pad on. This ultimately resulted in massive knee scrapping and bruising on one leg, and pristine teen-knee on the other.

The half pipe was out of visual range of the benround house, and there was a dirt road you could go down and park on behind the property, so if you went skating there, you never had to deal with the family themselves. There was a rumor that the benrouds had a small train, just like the one in Silver Spoons, but I never saw it.

On occasion, Heath's little brother (I can't even remember his name) used to come down. he was homeschooled. he was short, younger than us. he was a horrible skateboarder, he used to go back and forth on the half-pipe without ever going over the coping (so no chance of falling), he'd do it for like 15 minutes at a time, pissing off everyone else around him.

Now I know alot of people might say that home-schooled kids have no social skills, but this kid was the epitome of that standard. You'd ask him a question, and he'd just stare at you, then go back to talking about something else. Here's an example:

"Hey, where'd you get those shoes"
"...I got a pair of rollerblades"
"great, why don't you go get a huge extension cord, pull it on down here and plug it in so we can listen to hardcore while we skate"

I think at the end of one summer we ended up camping out there (we skated the entire night almost) and throwing his roller blades into the campfire. They burned with white-orange fire that rose to about 10 feet in the air. Later that night, off in the distance we could hear the unseen benroud mother yelling "GO HOME!!!!" Of course we didn't, because we were too punk rock for that.

so what's the point? If your home-schooled, your probably also a creationist. This means you deserve to have your rollerblades destroyed, your dad killed, and your half pipe trespassed on. Now get off your skate and hook up the boombox you crazy bastard.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Storm Chasing Madness!

So here's a few more pictures from the Mississippi folder. I used to be a driver on the Mississippi State University storm chase group. I spent 2 summers driving all the fuck over the greater portion of middle America trying to help a bunch of weather nerds see a tornado.

Storm Chasing was a worthy experience, I'm glad I did it. If you get the chance, I'd suggest going at least 1 time. I can't say that I would volunteer to do it again though. Its really boring. REALLY boring.

The lead professor described it like this "its like war, its hours and hours of total boredom followed by 5 minutes that will scare the shit out of you".

While I can't relate much to being in a warzone, I would say though that the rest is pretty accurate. Here's a short day in the life:

-Wake up a 9:30 am (yeah, you get to sleep late, because storms really don't get enough energy until about 4-6 pm, thats when they start to fire off).
-Review the weather outlook.
-Learn that where you actually need to be positioned for the best chase is about 400 miles away in the panhandle of Texas
-drive 400 miles as fast as you can.
-review weather outlook and current radar
-Drive anout 250 miles north to reposition yourself
-Drive 100 miles around to a good storm
-Park the car, pull out your wind meters and cameras, marvel at the winds, the clouds, the lightning, hope that a funnel will descend from wall cloud
-Drive 50 miles back in front of storm, repeat previous, do this until the sun goes down or another, more favorable storm comes along
-review the weather report for the next day
-Drive 300 miles to get into position for the next day

Best moment:

having a cocky student yell "we're all gonna die!" like a little bitch after listening to him talk about how bad-ass he was all day.

Worst moment:

Driving a passenger van of 8 students away from an oncoming storm with sustained 70 mph winds. crazy.

here's a massive wall cloud that was surreal - it was spinning like a top, like someone was slowly binding up cotton candy on a stick in one of those machines at the fair. shortly after this picture was taken we all had to drive away (see above).

60 mph sustained wind self portrait!!!!!!

One of the best looking storms we saw, the sun was setting just west of the southern tip of this supercell. pretty cool.

These kids lived in Piedmont, Oklahoma. Their entire town just lost all its power due to a wind-wrapped tornado that no one could see (partially because of the rain, but also the sun had just set). They wanted to see the Baron radar and weather equipment we had in one of the vans. The little girl in the front was pretty scared the whole time (rightfully so!) I always liked this picture because of the little girl's face.

I don't have many more good pictures of the storm chase. I spent 90% of the time driving, and I'm also a terrible photographer.

Pay Attention to me!!!!

So I saw this article online today. It hurt a bit, since I'm blogging, but then I thought she's absolutely right.

1. Why wouldn't you think people want attention? everyone wants to be considered at some point. People love talking about themselves, fuckin' a, I know I do.

2. isn't it better that people write about the banal events of their life on a website no one reads than to inflict their friends and family with these trivial stories? I have coworkers that will volunteer the most boring shit on a daily basis (a crime I'm certainly guilty of myself), why not spare everyone and put it all down in a format that hurts the least amount of people?

3. There was a guy who posted about this article on another site: he said he liked to tinker with the technology. completely valid. why not teach yourself some new computer skills, or at least experiment with technologies that you would otherwise remain ignorant of?

4. Rebecca (the author) is just as guilty as the rest of us. I mean, why write an article like this if you weren't looking for people to read it? and you know, this article has spawned thousands of shitty rebuttals on thousands of pointless and boring blogs all across the internet.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Cold Nights In Colorado...

its cold here, supposed to get down into the -10's tonight, and our new furnace is churning.

In Mississippi, there isn't much to do. its kinda like living in a minimum security prison..there are no fences, but walk about a half mile away from your house, and there's nothing but unending cotton fields and sweltering, mosquito infested, swampy forests.

I did ALOT of exercising in Misissippi. By the last summer we lived there, I running 28 miles per week on average, lifting weights, and mountain biking regularly. I LOVED mountain biking in mississippi. Mississippi has a TON of MTB trails, and little to no traffic on them. when riding, I don't think I EVER saw anyone else on a trail that wasn't in our group. thats a pretty sharp contrast to colorado, where you get run over by at least 35 douchebags every time you step foot outside.

Anyhow, here's a video clip that I uploaded to youtube. one day I tried to tape our video camera to my mountain bike, just like in the super-cool videos you see pros do.

Sometimes riding while filming can be painful.

Isis 2xLP~!

SO I've previously blogged about how ridiculously priced some records can go for. I also mentioned that I managed to Pick up a copy of Isis's new LP "In absence of truth" on violet colored vinyl the other day. (Listen to some Isis Here)

Today, the preorder copy of this album (the same version that I picked up) sold on ebay for $80.00.

1. Buy the preorder album online.
2. Receive album.
3. Put Album on Ebay
4. Sell album for 4 times the cost you bought it for
5. Profit.

Just to highlight how goddamn stupid some people are, there are still a few copies of the white vinyl version of this album available for sale on the robotic empire website...right now there is a copy for sale on ebay that is $15 more than robotic empire is selling it for.


Went Skiing this weekend...

...and by skiing, I mean snowboarding. I had a GREAT time, I love it when you just have a great ski day, where on every run you aren't tense or trying to hard. Instead, you just lay back into your carves and ride.

Here's a few bands that are essential to play on your ipod when you go snowboarding. If you don't have these, you suck:

1. DRI
2. Municipal Waste
3. Judge
4. Animosity
5. Deicide (only the new album "the stench of redemption")

What'd you do over christmas Break?

I overate, over-drank, and over-laid around doing nothing.

Check out what this guy did. (Nerd warning)

Friday, January 12, 2007

Playboy + MIlitary service = d'oh!

So I was updating my myspace profile a few weeks ago, and a guy I went to high school with added me. turns out his wife is a playboy model chick.

THis morning I woke up, got a cup of coffee and began to troll the news sites, including I saw this article, looked at the fark comments (which included pictures of said chick) and thought "man she looks familiar."

I checked my myspace and yep, there she was, married to the guy I went to high school with.

huh. Imagine that.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

My underwear is ridin' up.

I never tuck my shirts in at work, for the simple fact that it makes your underwear ride up. I can't handle that.

so I went out to the mall the other day, picked up some new shirts, and now I have my shirt tucked in here at work. I'm uncomfortable, I'm going to the bathroom every hour to adjust...its retarded.

Formerly, I supported my un-tucked lifestyle by replying with 1 of 2 excuses:

1. I'm a geologist. All good geologists should look kinda like edward abbey: beard, long scraggy hair, old button down shirt, old faded jeans and boots, big belt buckle with some amorphous chunk of turquoise on it, etc...


2. "Do you fucking know how much it costs to look this disheveled?"


Naked Raygun - Back !

I saw on a few boards lately that Naked Raygun, with the original lineup played a few shows last year.

They recently just updated a new website, and it sounds like they are back for good. I'm pretty sure they only had 2 really good albums, Jettison, and especially All Rise. somewhat melodic punk from Chicago.

I hope their new shit is better than that stupid saxophone based crap on Raygun....Naked Raygun.

Recent Reading...

So I’ve picked up a few more books to read. In Cold Blood, by Truman Capote, Midnight’s Children by Salman Rushdie, and Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bordain.

Midnight’s children I got because of a recommendation from a friend, and I kinda like Anthony Boudain’s books. I receive boundain’s cookbook last year for Christmas, and it’s the only cookbook that has threatened me with being a “fucking douchebag” if I failed at one of the recepies. Good times.

I’ve been getting through In cold Blood (check out the snappy book cover picture I put in!). I downloaded this as an audiobook right after I saw the movie “capote” thinking that it might be a good listen. Normally I really HATE books of the True Crime or just crime, mystery, etc… Mainly because they appear to be just depressing and I really just don’t like reading the gory details of some ridiculous death.

But In Cold Blood is a good read, certainly compelling, scary, freakish like some A&E crime-files story, but the thing that makes it so interesting is the tone of the writing, and the length’s at which Capote went into writing it. That was one of the theme’s of the movie “Capote” – he invented this new form of writing, ½ journalism, and ½ novel. None of this is News to anyone, since this book is pretty old, and Capote’s history is well-known enough for most people, shit most people have probably read this book already.

I’m not even gonna attempt to synthesize some interpretation or consider all the implicit nuances of the book, mainly because I’m a pretty shallow reader, and rarely pick up on shit like that. I usually end up thinking about trivial things, or just getting caught up in the story. In fact if I'm really interested in a book that I just completed reading, or if it was a book that I finished that I didn't understand at all (Like The Magus - a book that went way over my head), I usually troll the user reviews on to see what I missed.

But back to the book... I think one of the points of the book is “why in the hell did they do it?” Truly the murders were done in cold blood – there was no reason at all for them to kill the Clutter family. They went in thinking they were gonna just rob the family, they had several opportunities to just walk away from the whole situation – a course of action that Perry admitted to considering throughout the whole horrific scene.

Perry’s confession seems to imply that there was some bravado and resentment towards Dick, which is not an entirely alien concept to most dudes I think. There’s some implicit competition between all male-friends. The only difference is that most guys don’t fucking shoot people.

Capote illustrates the two killers fairly well, Dick just seemed like a psychopath – unable to consider the consequences of his actions a rouge who just didn’t give-a-fuck. And Perry just seemed like a pathetic dope, a moron. His fragmented personal life, and his growing up neglected by both his family and having no friends was motivation in his loyalty and desire to kiss the ass of convicts he encountered in his adult life . Like his devotion to Willie J, and to Dick. He seemed like the cliché sidekick, as Grover Dill is to Scott Farkus.

But I don’t know, I’m not sure if that was how Capote was trying to illustrate Perry. In the movie, it seemed that Capote was sympathetic to a lot of circumstances in Perry’s attitude and life. Like maybe Perry couldn’t be truly held responsible entirely for his actions. In the book he seemed to reinforce this…mentioning how Al Dewey “knew that one of the killers must not be completely devoid of charity” and describing the physical traits of Perry like “the sad, expressive eyes” etc…

The other thing that I really thought interesting about the book is the depth that Capote went into to write it. From the descriptions of what the Clutter’s were wearing (Nancy’s dress, and how she picked out the fabric and made it herself) to inner monologues with every person introduced in the book. In the Capote Movie, which is pretty much all I know about capote’s personal history, he was massively engrossed in the book.. He was so engrossed, so emotionally involved, that the movie implied that it destroyed his career, and changed him personally. He never wrote another book again as I understand.

It was a good read, something that I’ll probably think about for awhile. Of course, right now, I’m also almost finished with Kitchen Confidential…in a few days my shallow interest in this book will probably fade.

Monday, January 08, 2007

I'm terrible at Framing

Why is it so difficult for a kid like me to drive a 31/8 inch 16D framing nail into some studs?

I'm no good at this stuff. Luckily I think the sheet rock we plan to put on will hide my most egregious carpentry sins. Some of the problems I'm gonna blame on the basement. It has hand-poured portions to it, and the walls are not straight exactly, so nailing together a frame and then nailing it to the floor joists isn't exactly straightforward. Because of the basement factor, I had to install floating walls, which are a little more of a challenge: to adjust for floor movements, you have to hang the frames from the ceiling, and then tack them to the floor with 8" 60D galvanized spikes. Its code out here in Denver.

Some of the problems are my own...Its a first attempt.

I'm trying to remember when my dad framed my parents basement, he had to do some similar things...but then again, I have neither the eye, nor the natural talent for this shit that my dad has.

Below I give you my first attempt: a small room in our basement, complete with floating walls.

Next up, electrical and insulation followed by sheet rock.

First and Last Bands on your Ipod?

This question was asked of me today:

10,000 Maniacs


XKill EveryoneX

what does that say about me?

Interview update

So I had my job interview, it actually went pretty well. the job sounds pretty cool, and well, if this next interview goes well, I might actually take it, despite the commute.

It would be doing some interesting stuff, mainly infrastructure. Which would mean that I would be working on the other side of the coin. Right now I keep hold of this ridiculous notion that by somehow working for the EPA I'm doing a service to the world around me.

At this new job, i might be helping new mines to open, new roads to be built...which would be in direct opposition to the Earth Crisis song "Destroy the Machines":

Every biome on every continent in under man's attack.
With everything to lose we've drawn the
line to hold them back. New bridges,
roads and dams pave the way to develop what wilderness remains.
All must be prevented or
detroyed for the wild lands to sustain.

If I'm as Hardcore as I tell everyone I am, then I don't know...I might be selling out. Of Course, the other night I was wearing my Vegan Reich t-shirt while cooking a pork dinner and sipping I guess I was a sellout long ago.

I think the job will be a good Idea. I'm sure I'll reflect on it at least 20,000 more times between now and the time of the second interview.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

NYHC - Talk About Unity

There's been alot of hardcore in the press lately, American hardcore is a doctumentary out just recently, there's been books of the same name, etc...

All of them seem to be written about what was happening in the California hardcore scene in the 1980's and the 1990's, and NONE of them ever cover the East Coast scenes, New York In particular. New York Hardcore...there's a Documentary coming out that appears to cover bands that really took and made hardcore into the scene that it was in the 1990's and was the foundation of what it is today. In high school and college, I mainly listened to New York hardcore, its sound was way more raw, gritty, and just had more energy than alot of the bands from anywhere else.

All the great bands are in this trailer, Youth of Today, Sick of it all, Bold, Gorilla Biscuits, Token Entry, Warzone, Agnostic Front, Reagan Youth, Kraut, Bad Brains, etc... I'd really like to see this!!

So I have a job interview in 1 hour.

its a phone interview.

Its a job that could be really good or pretty much the same as I'm doing now. There is a huge drawback to it already, its in the Denver Tech Center.

the Denver Tech center is just a series of office buildings in Denver that suffer some of the worst traffic. Its an office like Initech. When I'd be in the office, it'd be a cubicle farm, lots of corporate atmosphere, lunches at chili's and "authentic" deli's . My commute would be significantly longer.

But then again, this job might have more opportunity for professional growth, which might mean more $$$$...I guess I'll find out soon.

stupid Job interviews.

I'll let you all know how it turns out soon.

BLAST from the PAST

Here's what I looked like in High School. Dig the glasses and the lack of about 40 lbs of body weight.

care to venture a comment on what I was thinking when this picture was taken?

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Back At Work!!!

After a long holiday break, I'm back to cubicle hell in the office. I don't have any immediate travel plans yet, but looks like another trip to Crested Butte Might happen sometime soon (see below).

I had a decent holiday, I got everything I wanted for christmas, and then some.

Its really hard to get back into the routine of office work after about 1 month of field work followed by 1.5 weeks of vacation/holiday.

Some interesting things that have happened in the time I've been gone:

-My friend Jay had surgery for a collapsed lung. I know he's doing better now, but its gonna be a slow recovery for him.

-My friend Lee and his girlfriend Tracy are pregnant! congrats to them. (I heard this from my friend erik).

-We started framing in a new room in our house. so far I've put up 2 floating walls, framed in a window, and smashed my right index finger with a hammer. Luckily I haven't cut my fucking arm off with the circular saw yet (knock on wood). I hope to have some pictures of that soon. Its harder than I thought, and I'm sure that a professional carpenter would laugh at my framing job, but what do I care?

-I managed to secure a copy of Isis's new LP on robotic empire records. A great band, and their new LP sold out on the website in about 1 hour yesterday. hooray for new records!

-I bought 1 share of haliburton stock on my etrade account. How damn hypocritical is that? Not sure what I was thinking. Actually I know exactly what I was thinking: I had about $31.00 left over from a stock sale/purchase I did a few weeks ago and also saw that haliburton stock was about the same price. so I just bought 1 share. Next up, a $500 per-plate dinner with Dick Cheney and George Bush. I am the white devil.

thats about it for now I guess.

Crested Butte, Part 2.

I finally got some cool pictures of my trip to Crested Butte. We installed a remote datalogger to a stream flume. believe it or not the creek where we installed these was still flowing, and this instrument will take stream measurements every 15 minutes for the next 3 years.

Here's me and my coworker Jerry installing the instrument box (yes, the snow where the post was installed was about 5 feet deep!!! (it took 2 hours just to dig out enough room to work).

Here's a picture of the valley. it was a beautiful day we had to install this shit, a light snow over everything (note Jerry in the instrument trench, Jerry is about 5'11" and the snow is up near the top of his head)

A Picture of the snow-cat we rented. the snow where its digging out is more than 5 feet deep. it was pretty cool to get to ride in this thing. I was going up 40% slopes before it got stuck. It felt like the first hill on a roller coaster, that clink, clink of the treads and the steep incline.

Here's us walking UP the mountainside after the snow-cat got stuck in about 8 feet of freshly drifted snow. Ultimately we couldn't get to the other site to install the other monitor (we're actually considering using a Heli-skiing helicopter company to air-drop us into the next site sometime this month!)